Saturday, November 29, 2008

why?

why do we all have to grow up and be somebody who is held responsible for their own actions?! why can't we all just stay little, young, irresponsible, happy?! why do we have to grow up and make our lives complicated?! why do we have to grow up and to get hurt (emotionally) and hurt others?!
i wonder is their even one single positive side to being 'all grown up!'

i hate being grown up today. i just wish i could be that cute, little, carefree, happy girl, when i just couldn't stay sad after a my favorite chocolate ice-cream, when i did not have a care in the world (except my homework, of course!) when i had plenty of time to dream about how beautiful life will be (now, obviously i know the reality) when i did not have to worry about how others will judge me, when i did not have to think about how i will be interpreted, when i use to feel guilty after lying (not like now, when i feel guilty for not feeling guilty enough after lying!) when i used to have fairytale dreams, when i knew that my favorite color was pink, when i assumed that every one is happy in their lives and when i believed that this world is a beautiful place!

now, it aches my heart to pull myself back to reality which is just the opposite.